Excitement, nerves, feeling tired, second-guessing yourself, fear, a sense of leveling up, and asking what’s next.
These are a vast range of emotions, but from personal experience, this is what it really feels like to buy your first home.
I thought buying your first home would be a fun process from start to finish. However, I couldn’t have been more wrong.
There are countless sleepless nights scrolling Zillow, looking for houses that meet your needs and wants while still being affordable. From the excitement of touring your first home to feeling exhausted from touring too many homes, it’s a rollercoaster.
Without a doubt, buying a house is a huge emotional process, and below is what it really feels like to buy your first home.
The Excitement Phase
Like pretty much anything new, it always starts out with excitement.
This is the phase that defines what it really feels like to buy your first home at the beginning, pure optimism.
My wife and I had these grand visions of open spaces, property, a huge kitchen with a big island, and for my wife, a bathroom with a nice soaking tub.
We started to imagine our life in this picture-perfect house, and we were on cloud nine. We were filled with enthusiasm and believed that we were going to be able to get everything we wanted in a home.
I remember us saying things like, “We will find the perfect house in no time,” “We will definitely be able to afford that feature,” and “We will never need to rent again.”
But that didn’t last long.
The Reality Check
This is where what it really feels like to buy your first home starts to shift.
Our lender introduced us to a loan officer she worked with regularly, and we began the pre-approval process and number crunching.
After providing all the necessary documents, the loan officer told us we were approved for a maximum home loan of $550,000.
While that might sound like a lot, for the area we lived in, it was relatively small.
It wasn’t overly restrictive, but it was enough for us to realize that many of the dream features we wanted weren’t viable at that price range.
Not to mention, the monthly payment on a $550,000 loan was stretching our budget to the max, which we didn’t want to do.
So we began searching for a home that fit within our budget.
The Searching Phase
This is where the experience really begins to set in.
I remember the loan officer saying after our pre-approval, “The boring admin stuff is done, now go have fun with your real estate agent and find the perfect home.”
So my wife and I began scouring internet listings for homes within our budget. Every home we liked, we added the address to an Excel spreadsheet.
From there, we worked with our real estate agent to schedule showings.
The night before our first set of showings was exciting. We thought we had found some amazing homes, ones that could definitely be “the one.” I’m not going to lie; it was hard for me to sleep that night.
However, to our disappointment, those homes were not even close to what we were looking for.
We got a harsh dose of reality: listing photos tend to omit the flaws, terrible locations, small kitchens, odd layouts, or just random things you don’t like.
We tried to stay positive, but the more homes you see, the more discouraged you feel. Not to mention the fatigue. There’s nothing worse than driving 45 minutes to a house, opening the door, and instantly knowing it’s a no.
Disagreements
Another part of what it really feels like to buy your first home that no one talks about is how hard it is to agree.
For instance, my wife fell in love with one house, but I didn’t like the location.
I felt we should buy in a safer neighborhood a little farther from the city center, while she wanted to be closer to the airport and downtown for commuting.
We’ve always been good at compromising, but compromising on a house is much harder than I ever imagined.
When you fall in love with a house, you’re no longer making decisions based on facts, you’re making emotional decisions. And those emotions can make it very difficult to budge.
The Offer
My wife and I eventually decided to buy a new build, so we didn’t need to place a traditional offer. We filled out an application, placed a deposit, and the house was informally ours (it was still being built).
Leading up to that decision, there was a lot of angst. A lot of back and forth, asking, “Is this the right thing to do?”
I remember my wife getting cold feet and suggesting we back out.
It’s such a big decision, and placing that deposit makes it real. That’s a very scary feeling for a first-time homebuyer, especially knowing you’re committing to a long-term financial obligation.
Closing Process
Our closing process was fairly long since the home was only halfway built when we placed our deposit. It took about 4 to 5 months before we got the keys.
At first, it felt like getting the keys was a long way off. But in reality, those months flew by.
Then once the closing process truly began, it became information overload.
The amount of paperwork made it feel like you were signing your life away. The number of people involved was overwhelming, we worked with the builder, loan officer, real estate agent, and a notary.
There were days filled with multiple phone calls just to make sure everything was correct.
Then came the scary part, handing over the down payment.
We got a cashier’s check from the bank and gave it to the notary for escrow. I’ll be honest, seeing that amount of money leave was painful, especially as someone who is a saver. But you bite the bullet and let it go.
Then on closing day, you get the call that everything is recorded. You meet your agent, get the keys, and your excitement is at an all-time high.
Don’t forget to take photos to commemorate the moment.
The First Few Weeks of Owning a Home
That first time entering your home is surreal. It’s an amazing feeling knowing you actually own it.
But that feeling quickly shifts when you realize, you now have to move.
Those first few weeks are chaotic, running around getting everything set up. But it’s also rewarding. You’re planting roots and making the space your own.
Then you start noticing things.
In our case, the outlets didn’t have USB ports, and I didn’t have the right adapters, so suddenly I’m thinking, “We need to replace all of these.”
Also, new builds don’t come with finished backyards. Ours was just dirt, which didn’t work well with a Frenchie that loves being outside.
So now we needed to handle the backyard too.
Even with a brand-new home, there’s still work to be done, and money to be spent.
That’s something no one really tells you.
You will want to make upgrades no matter what.
Speed of the Entire Process
The last thing I want to mention is how fast everything moves.
When we first met with our realtor, we thought it would take weeks to get pre-approved and start seeing homes.
We were completely wrong.
We met with a lender the next day, got approved within a couple of days, and were touring homes immediately after.
Even the 4–5 months waiting for our home to be built went by incredibly fast.
So be prepared, this process moves quickly. And if you need to slow things down, don’t be afraid to say so.
Final Thoughts
Buying a house is definitely not for the faint of heart. The emotions you experience will be wide-ranging, and you will be tested throughout the process.
For every high, there will be a low, but that’s okay. It’s just part of the journey.
If you make it through, you’ll come out the other side with a new appreciation for the process, and hopefully, a home you love.
May your home buying journey be as smooth as possible.